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Here’s my conflict: I want to use this blog to write about my daily life (which I may be deluded into thinking is very interesting), but I fear it may be clashing with the purpose of this blog. While I may think my life is the best thing on Earth (next to sleeping and green tea mochi ice cream), my followers (ugh, this word makes me feel like a clan leader, I think I will go with “readers” from now on) may not think so. I suppose I could separate all my musings into another blog, but then I would probably end up with two sparsely updated, dead blogs rather than one not-as-dead-but-still-sparsely-updated blog.

So after arduous deliberation (for like ten minutes) I decided that it is my blog, and I should be able to do whatever I want with it. I am not an author, I don’t need to build an image. I don’t blog daily, nor do I want to obligate myself to do so. I am just not an avid blogger. I don’t track my site traffic. I don’t even care if I have readers (though it makes me happy if I do.) I rather spend my time reading or watching Family Guy than forcing myself to type something. Of course I hope to have a lot of readers that worship whatever I write, but that’s not the point of this blog. The point of this blog is for my to seduce people into reading even if I have to bribe people with cookies, and for me to tell everyone I’m interesting. I have an big ego, I know.

Perhaps the only problem is living up to the expectations of publishers and authors expecting me to read and review their books. I currently have two books I plan to review from publishers, and because I have accepted them I feel obligated to complete the job. While I love free books (who doesnt’?), I dislike this obligated feeling (while I do truly want to read the book). While I love ARCs and having first dibs, I don’t think I can live up to the other end of the bargain before I go crazy with stress. I am also aware that publishers look for active sites with good traffic but promoting takes too much work. I rather cuddle up with a book than market my blog. At this rate, I don’t think any big shot publisher would be willing to send me ARCs not do I feel like I have the qualifications to request them. It makes me sad, but I might as well leave that to the more experienced, dedicated book bloggers out there: it’s only fair.

Ewww, this post is so long. I have to put a picture here to make it not look so drab (it’s my logic.) Here’s a cat.

With book reviews, I feel like I am focusing too much on marketing a book, spilling fancy words whenever I can. I think I lose myself in the process, this is not the way I want to write all the time. While I love to share my book thoughts, finding the opportunity to rant, at times I feel like I am writing a literary analysis for English (aka. desperately bang my head on a desk the night before the due date hoping for something enlightening to say, then spout nonsense until I reach the word count). That stuff makes my head hurt, in more ways than one. Book reviews don’t feel “me,” I sound more like a publicist or someone that is trying too hard to find something intelligent to say. I am not a book critic, over analyzing books and spouting fancy words is what I do in English essays, not what I want to do in every blog post here. I want people to like me (or at least feel my presence on this blog), and book reviews isn’t going to do it for me. I will not be a replica of the host of book blogs out there.

I don’t like the restrictions of “book blog” which seems to imply I will be a book news microphone, copy and pasting book “news.” There are many popular book blogs that already do that, and reach a larger audience. I also have no interest in simply reblogging what I find online. If I like your book, I will promote it, simple as that.